From the rising of the sun to its going down
the Lord's name is to be praised!

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

Gone Squirrely

Let me tell you a squirrely tale. Now before you grab a coffee and settle in for a heartwarming story telling, let me warn you, this is actually something that may leave you feeling a little unsettled. So grab a blanket for security.

It all began one day when I was headed out the door with a load of wet laundry at my hip. I was making my way towards the big red porch steps, that led to our second level porch where the clothesline was situated. On my way, a squirrel raced ahead of me and stopped about five steps up. He looked me in the eyes as if to claim his territory. Naturally, I starred him down in order to claim what was rightfully mine. As the contest wore on, my nerves began to tingle. This squirrel was no ordinary squirrel...let's just say the laundry hanging was postponed until the backyard was free of squirrels.

The next squirrely episode began, when one Spring day, I noticed a squirrel in a hanging flower pot. I notified the head of the household and he took care of business. He stormed outside, grabbed the thief by it's tail, and gave a sound yank-throw all in one swift motion. My dear, gentle husband had not only saved my flowers, he had ripped off the squirrel's tail! The squirrel darted towards the neighbor's fence and again a starring contest ensued. This time we won.

There is one sad note to this second episode that I hesitate to tell. You see, when the tail of the squirrel ended up in my husbands hand, he gingerly threw it in the garden, glared a the squirrel (as his wife yelped beside him 'See!!!!! I told you they stare!!! I'm not crazy!!!'), and walked back into the house. The next day, the girls were playing outside and what should they find but a long, black furry thing. The questioning began, and what can a mother do but tell the truth?

Not only do the squirrels in our neighborhood claim territory that is not theirs, they confuse toys with nuts. Now I'm being gracious in this judgement; I am giving them the benefit of the doubt. It really could be that they are nasty at heart and simply want to ruin children's fun but I will assume for now that they are merely confused.

You see, the thing that makes me doubtful, is that a round, neon- orange-colored-ball looks nothing like your typical harvest nut. I have pictures of this confused squirrel and you can take your pick as to whether or not the squirrels are confused or mean spirited.

(Cast your vote at the 'Squirrely Poll' on the top, right hand corner of my blog!)
**Squirrely Poll has ended-THANK YOU for participating!
Just the other day, I thought I heard a knocking at the door or a tapping on my window. I walked towards the door and there sat a squirrel on my window sill. He was taunting me, I'm sure. There were no nuts in his hands to crack so the noise could only have been meant to disturb my supper making process.

My oldest daughter instructs her sister well when she says "Sen, you can't go out there! See that squirrel-he will eat you!" Very wise Mia! Or is this fear mongering?

To say the least, we have all gone squirrely!


Jen said...

I hate squirrels. They are giant rats with furry tails (although I guess your squirrel is only a giant rat!!). Too funny that it has commandeered your children's toys.
This was a great post! Keep them coming!

Mark, Linda, Alex, Carsten and Savannah said...

Mel, you should write a book! Very talented writer.

Anonymous said...

Mel, you so often put a smile on my face! I agree with Linda - write a book :)Great Post - keep them coming!!

Jacqui's Quilts said...

Hey Mel:

The squirrels around our house try to take over too! They're digging in my flower pots and leaving dirt all over!!! A few weeks ago I heard a major racket upstairs...I tiptoed gingerly up the stairs and carefully peeked into Jake's office where the noise was coming from...a squirrel was climbing up the screen! I gave him the major fright of his life by banging on the window. Years ago, one actually got into the house and freaked me out when I met him on the stairs!! They can be very destructive...keep a lid on 'em LOL.


Megan said...

I have had my bad experiences with Squirrels as well! I loaded Ethan and baby Abby in the car just days after she was born in the garage. When I looked up there was a squirrel hanging directly above my head staring at me! Freaky!!!
Another time I woke up in the spring to an awful screaming sound, opened my eyes to a squirrel hanging on the outside of my screen screaming in at me!!!
One of my neighbours feed them, I find the strangest food on my window sills!

Taunya said...

ha ha I voted you've gone squirrely! your hilarious. I can't beleive Dan detailed the thing, no wonder he stares at you. I do agree he is an odd squirrel though, I've seen him stare through the screen door.

Mom Van Dyk said...

Definately mean spirited and perhaps a mite confused! One of his cousins, a beady eyed chipmunk, climbed up our back wall a few years back where there were multiple birds' nest among the ivy. Some pitiful chirping called me out onto the back porch. There he was in a nest,defiantly staring me down. He had eaten a poor baby birdy's beak right off! I went after him with a vengance but unfortunately they are too fast for us poor humans. How ever did Dan manage to get hold of a squirrel's tail???

chris said...

Nice tale, but squirrels have tails. (except for one now)

Mel said...

Thanks for sharring your squirrel tales with me guys!! Makes me feel somewhat sane...
I fixed all the 'tail' mistakes (I think). Thanks for pointing that out!! :O) ...or should I make up some sort of excuse and say it was a 'play on words'?

Mel said...

Oh, and a few of you asked how Dan grabbed the tail?! I was quite shocked to witness it myself but the squirrel was so engrossed in the pot that he must not have seen us coming. Dan literally reached into the pot and grabbed it's tale...I saw it all kind of in slow motion! :O)
Jaqui, I don't know how you managed with a squirrel in the house!!! I would probably have called Dan home from work!

Mel said...

Dope! I did the 'tale' thing again in my last comment!

Brian and Amanda said...

Here's a spiritual analogy for squirrels...the writer isn't always very conservative, but often has great points for thinking :-)

Lynnette Feijer said...

LOL I love it Mel!!!

G &;S said...

I agree with Jen - they are rats..I dislike squirrels too. I honestly thought the 'tale' part was your clever play on words in your blog!

Anonymous said...

I'm really enjoying your blog. Who says that staying at home with children is boring? Your home is full of life - good for you!

Mel said...

Thanks Marietta!! By the way, the peaches turned out very good!!! Thanks so much for your intructions!!!!
Amanda, I checked out the link...very neat!!!

Anonymous said...

tehe. Mel, my mom read this post and told me that i must read it, and i am glad I did. It has given me a good chuckle. I am stunned that your gentle natured hubby was able to, not only catch the squirrel, but manage to dismember it! Hehe, I can just see it now. Don't squirrels use their tails for balance? He probley told all his friends why he can't climb trees anymore and now they are going to torment you. =)